我去哪儿？

今天是二零零七年五月三十一号。 昨天我坐地铁去美国大使馆。 美国大使馆在Bond St.地铁站的西南边。 美国大使馆对面有一个公园儿。

星期天我坐飞机去加拿大。 加拿大在美国的北面， 在英国的西面。 加拿大比英国大。 加拿大冬天比英国很冷。 我去Banff. Banff 很漂亮。

Translation:

Where am I going?

Today is May 31, 2007. Yesterday, I took the tube to the American embassy. The American embassy is southwest of the Bond St. tube station. Across from the American embassy there is a park.

On Sunday, I will fly to Canada. Canada is north of America, and west of England. Canada is bigger than England. In the winter, Canada is much colder than England. I'm going to Banff. Banff is beautiful.

The park across from the American embassy is Grosvenor Park. Séverine pointed out to me that this area of London is called Mayfair and that "My Fair Lady" is a pun on "Mayfair Lady" (I didn't know that).

Lollipops

There's a lovely text called Local Fields by J.W.S. Cassels, which is not a field guide to regional farmland but an introduction to p-adic numbers. His preface begins with a quote:

My heart is inditing a good matter. Psalm 45.

Before listing the contents of the book he issues a warning:

Paragraphs which can be omitted at a first reading are marked with an asterisk. But if you do skip them, then you miss some of the lollipops.

BANKSY

Should five per cent appear too small

Yesterday I took a trip down to the IRS office at the American Embassy. Even though U.S. citizens living abroad get an automatic two month extension to file their taxes, I was the only one visiting the IRS and got to bypass the long lines of visa applicants. Also, having taken their advice to leave all bags and electronic devices at home, I got in with a wave of my Massachusetts driver's license and a quick duck through the metal detector.

On the website for the IRS office, it clearly says that they won't answer questions over the phone; you have to go down to the office in person. Maybe I misunderstood, but I swear there was a sign up in the office advising you to call to get your questions answered.

The people in the office were very friendly though and happy to just answer my questions on the spot. It doesn't seem like my situation should be that unusual, but I read the relevant information, and it's not at all clear what I'm supposed to do. This one guy seemed very well versed in the technical details of the treaty which gives us the Foreign Earned Income exemption. This exemption says that if you live here in England for 330 days of a given year (starting at any time) then income earned here (under about $80,000) is exempt from U.S. taxes. The part that's unclear is that I haven't yet lived here for a full year, but I plan on doing so, so that, after I've been here for a year, then I can claim this exemption from the time I got here. But I'm supposed to file my taxes for 2006 now...

Unfortunately, as it turns out, this whole question is irrelevant to me. I had a secret fear that I didn't even want to mention, and it has been realized. Apparently Fred has betrayed me, because my stipend is not considered "earned income" at all. I don't work for my pay. It's unearned income, so the U.S. government feels no compunction whatsoever in taxing the pittance on which I live. Worse, that money is converted into U.S. dollars before it's taxed. It's not so bad this year, because I've only been here for a few months, but next year it will look like a real salary, and they'll tax it that way.

On the bright side, they told me to just bring down all my information and they'd help me to fill out the necessary forms and file my taxes right there. "Really?!?" I asked, incredulous. In retrospect, it's probably easier and faster for them to help me fill out all the forms than for them to explain to me how it works, but I would have thought that I'd have to pay someone to do that for me.